FIYA NFL
Rankings
**Week 12** |
Rank |
Team |
FIYA Analysis |
1 |
Patriots
 |
Great. So, now that we've got the "blueprint," all we need is for a team with two good corners and a great safety to put up 32 points and hope New England doesn't run the ball or make any adjustments. It's possible, I suppose. |
2 |
Cowboys
 |
That front four is arguably as good, if not better than the Pack's and Giants' in the NFC. They've made Terrance Newman look competent. |
3 |
Colts
 |
Anyone else find it eerie that Indy is grinding, playing like the old Pats and New England is airing it out like Indy teams of years past? |
4 |
Packers
 |
Ever since Jason Sehorn ruined his career, I've had a thing against having your best corner return kicks (Deion aside). Charles Woodson's toe injury is a perfect example. |
5 |
Jaguars
 |
David Garrard is the Eddy Curry of football; he simply refuses to throw a pick. |
6 |
Steelers
 |
Knowing it's going to not only rain, but pour every time they play on Monday night, if I was a share cropper, I would move to Pittsburgh ASAP. That's three confirmed quality soil mornings, in a four month span. |
7 |
Seahawks
 |
When asked if he planned to return to the Seahawks at any point, this season, Shawn Alexander smiled exposing his gap and jumped into a luxury SUV next to Pat Robertson without responding. |
8 |
Buccaneers
 |
This defense is pressed for turnovers. They hop on them faster than fat kids at Pillsbury sponsored scavenger hunts. |
9 |
Giants
 |
I'd like to induct Eli Manning into The Black QB Club. No, he's not in an interracial relationship, but he does get fingered after every loss like all other black QB's, while his white counterparts skip away blame free. |
10 |
Browns
 |
Jamal Lewis seems to be back in pre-drug trafficking form. |
11 |
Chargers
 |
As average as his year has seemed, LaDanian is still going to finish 2007 up with over 1300 yards and 15 TD's. Damn. |
12 |
Lions
 |
Calvin Johnson is slowly starting to dominate. If he can keep his back loose enough down the stretch, who knows. |
13 |
Saints
 |
I pondered a couple of weeks ago what could be if Marques Colston stayed healthy for a prolonged period of time. Looks like I might get to find out. |
14 |
Titans
 |
Sticking up for Vince, the only thing the guys on ESPN Gameday could have done better is name-drop Merril Hoge. We all know that's who the ether was directed to. |
15 |
Eagles
 |
Only in Goomba-town can a QB throw three picks and a controversy involving the injured starter immediately follow. |
16 |
Redskins
 |
|
17 |
Vikings
 |
Minnesota returned the 41 points to the Giants that New York dropped on them in the 2000 NFC Championship game, but for some reason, it just doesn’t feel the same. |
18 |
Bears
 |
Devin Hester is giving the guys over at EA Sports an aneurism. Improving on his amazing rookie season, they're going to have to up his speed to 120, thus totally fucking up the Madden '09 ratings system. |
19 |
Broncos
 |
The secondary wasn't horrible, but they did let Rex Growthlessman march down the field, three times on them in the fourth quarter and overtime. |
20 |
Bills
 |
Back to Edwards? Why not. |
21 |
Cardinals
 |
Great game against the 49ers. It's just too bad someone had to lose…wait, no its not. A tie would have totally sucked. |
22 |
Bengals
 |
I think Chad needed that game more for his sanity than anything else. |
23 |
Panthers
 |
Have you noticed that since Steve Smith checked Dwayne Jarrett, he has been stinking it up? I have. Maybe he needs to check himself. |
24 |
Texans
 |
Witnessing Ron Dayne contribute is like witnessing the dead bird in Dumb and Dumber regain its life. |
25 |
Raiders
 |
Did you know Antonio Fargas had a role as a taxi driver in the 1984 blockbuster, Firestarter, starring Heather Locklear and Martin Sheen? You can't imagine how long I've been holding on to that gem. |
26 |
Chiefs
 |
Arson's Fiya Revelation Of The Week: Pirates are stupid. What's with the whole making somebody walk a plank thing? First of all, you waste good wood
*pause*
then you make everyone come out on that cold ass deck only to watch some dirtbag disappear in an instant. Just throw the nigga overboard and be done with it. |
27 |
49ers
 |
Frank Gore sure took advantage of not having a broken ACL, last Sunday. His 200+ rushing and receiving led Frisco to a much needed win. |
28 |
Falcons
 |
Between Alge Crumpler and LJ Smith, one of them deserves a poster with the caption: "Most underachieving TE in the NFL." |
29 |
Rams
 |
Gus Frerotte's goal line fumble on the last snap of the Seattle game left me with the emptiest feeling following a conclusion that I've felt since The Matrix Revolutions. |
30 |
Ravens
 |
At some point do you think the Ravens defensive players just tune Ray and all his preaching out? Especially on road trips, you know all them niggas done copped those noise canceling Shure earphones for their IPods. |
31 |
Jets
 |
Look on the bright side, David Harris allows you Jets fans to finally let go of the pipe dream known as Jonathan Vilma. |
32 |
Dolphins
 |
Watching Joey Porter get up and flex in front of the Pittsburgh bench after his pick was the most swagger filled moment I've seen in a man since Rapper, Niks took a step back last year and bellowed, "Oh you mad, cause I'm stylin on you." Highlight of the Dolphins season until New England catches an L. |
