FIYA NFL
Rankings
**Week 10** |
Rank |
Team |
FIYA Analysis |
1 |
Patriots
 |
Never mind the "trap game" stuff, never mind the fact that Tom Brady has historically struggled against the Bills' defense, never mind the bye potentially throwing off their rolling offense. Forget all that shit. People get paralized and fucked up in Buffallo. Beli better not try to pad against them. It could cost somebody a vertibrae. |
2 |
Colts
 |
Pick six indeed. That’s what they get for cheating with that crowd noise, last week. Nope, they did it. |
3 |
Cowboys
 |
The class of the NFC, no doubt, but somebody tell Patrick Crayton to shut the fuck up. Don't that boy know he's gonna be the first person they point to when Romo gets his block knocked off? T.O.'s security is gonna have him inaccessible and Pat's gonna have to use his big mouth to get outta trouble. |
4 |
Packers
 |
Wow, they've even found a running game. Jesus just loves this community team a bunch. |
5 |
Steelers
 |
Did you see how hype Big Ben was after he scored that TD? Dude looked like Kramer after he won that ping-pong match at the Del Boca Vista. |
6 |
Jaguars
 |
Many have asked me where David Garrard is? Well, you didn't hear it from me, but David and Byron Leftwich have secretly met up and are now penning a screenplay about housing homeless New Orleans rappers, post Katrina. It's gonna be called, "Up To My Ankles In It, Wodie." |
7 |
Giants
 |
Lose to Detroit, next week and the New York November jinx gets Madden jinx billing. |
8 |
Titans
 |
Sure, blame Vince, but that running game was absolutely horrible against the Jags. LenDale was more interested in his order with the corndog and pig feet man. |
9 |
Chargers
 |
Goddamn, did you see that Sproles' feet? Them shits loooked like Sonic the Hedgehog on my old Genesis. |
10 |
Lions
 |
Minus 18 yards (that’s -18) on eight carries. Someone really deserves to be placed against a wall in Central America and shot. |
11 |
Seahawks
 |
Oops, I forgot last week, but Nate Burleson had the celebration of the year, in Cleveland. LeBron you've been owned. *click here to see* |
12 |
Buccaneers
 |
What a great bye week for Chucky and the boys; They sip merlot while Carolina and New Orleans throw up on themselves. |
13 |
Browns
 |
In a rare moment of tenderness, by yours truly, I came close to letting a couple tears go after viewing the Shape-up Edwards featuring on ESPN, over the weekend. He's a good guy with Godly footwork. |
14 |
Redskins
 |
You're not going to sit there with a straight face and tell me James Thrash was able to do things Santana Moss, Randel El and [Ari] Lloyd!!! [/Gold] couldn't do for the first eight games of the season. I'm not going for it. That play calling sucks. |
15 |
Bills
 |
Win the games you're supposed to and pray niggas from the good teams drink like fish on the Saturday nights before they play you. The 2006 New York Jets motto is working for the 2007 Bills. |
16 |
Saints
 |
Someone blame Drew Brees. Please! He's the leader! Say it! Anyone…I dare you! |
17 |
Panthers
 |
As terrible as they've played, even with old ass Sam Huff quarterbacking them, they're still just a game out of first in the morbid NFC-South. |
18 |
Broncos
 |
Bailey and Bly with picks in a big AFC-West match-up. Where has this been, all year? |
19 |
Eagles
 |
McNabb and Westbrook. Why teams even pay attention to any other Philly offensive player, I haven't the slightest idea. |
20 |
Bears
 |
Now Growthlessman is back under center? Lord, please get them McNabb before he's in McNair-Baltimore shape and useless. |
21 |
Chiefs
 |
Anybody else that watched the Hard Knocks joint on HBO get the feeling that neither Huard nor Croyle were the answer? |
22 |
Cardinals
 |
Steve Breaston is listed at 189. Yeah, fuckin right. |
23 |
Bengals
 |
|
24 |
Falcons
 |
I wonder if the ATL phat bitches-to-great weather ratio in Tampa has sustained Warrick Dunn. |
25 |
Texans
 |
Arson's Fiya Question Of The Week: A serious query; are you supposed to tip the guy that brings food out to your car when you call it in, or the bartender that simply hands you the bill, when you stroll in for your grub?
Oh, I'm not tipping either one of them, because they haven't done shit, but I just want to know if I'm imagining these people shoot me shady ass looks when i give them that correct change or wait for my money. |
26 |
Ravens
 |
I can't wait to see what Ray-Ray's bald ass has to say, this week. |
27 |
Vikings
 |
It was so obvious that Peterson was going to get fucked up this week. You could not pay me to start him against them 18 defensive linemen from Green Bay. |
28 |
Rams
 |
I wonder if Torry Holt ruined his potential broadcasting career by standing up and cheering for Maurice Clarett when Denver drafted him. You think I'm bad. These muhfuckka's don't forget shit. |
29 |
49ers
 |
Alex Smith averaged more per run than he did per pass attempt, Monday night. I didn't think this was possible for a white QB. |
30 |
Raiders
 |
So, what exactly is the reason to not start your number one pick, again? |
31 |
Jets
 |
Mangini, ever the motivator, made his whole team listen to Tim Robbins narrate all of the Harry Potter books, this week. |
32 |
Dolphins
 |
In probably the only bright spot to Miami's abysmal season, we have the coming out party of Jesse Chapman. The boy works as hard as his name sounds like it would work for civil rights. Keep going Jesse, you are somebody. |
