FIYA NFL Rankings
**Week 13** |
Rank |
Team |
FIYA Analysis |
1 |
Chargers
 |
Only two, this week? Wash your face, Ladanian. Wash your face. |
2 |
Patriots
 |
Speaking of faces, big face Corey had the wackest rushing day for the most fantasy points, ever. |
3 |
Bears
 |
Parcells did it...Shanahan did it...for God's sake, Joe Gibbs did it. You know what you must do before it's too late, Lovie. |
4 |
Colts
 |
|
5 |
Cowboys
 |
Even with Romo coming back down to Earth, they pull out a tough divisional game, on the road. |
6 |
Ravens
 |
Seeing as though they didn't let Chad Johnson rack up 300 yards, they don't fall any farther. |
7 |
Saints
 |
Most of the headlines for Reggie Bush, this past week read "Break Out," when they should have read "About Damn Time." |
8 |
Bengals
 |
Please tell me another one of these niggas didn't get locked up. Please. |
9 |
Seahawks
 |
Darrell Jackson is challenging Trick Daddy Dollars (yup, whole name) and Kimbo Slice for the dirtiest looking facial hair display in Black America. |
10 |
Chiefs
 |
What's the big deal over Larry Johnson's comments? Is it really so hard to believe a black coach could relate to a black player on issues other than football easier than the previous two 80-year-old white men, he played under? |
11 |
Jaguars
 |
Wonder where Byron will be playing next year? Meet Mr. me too. |
12 |
Broncos
 |
That field goal fiasco would have gotten a black coach fired. |
13 |
Jets
 |
Hahahahaahaha, you see their schedule? They're going to the playoffs. |
14 |
Falcons
 |
Despite drops on two of his first three or four passes, Vick was finally able to overcome that train wreck of a last month and lead his Falcons to a much needed win. |
15 |
Giants
 |
Five minutes after the Cowboys win at Giants stadium, a drunken Jim Fassel stumbled out of a New York City bar yelling something about accountability and bullshit. |
16 |
Eagles
 |
A day after Philly's big victory over Carolina, T.O. was asked to comment about his former team's win without Donovan McNabb. When he gushed over how great of a job the backup did, the room went silent as everyone but Owens already knew he was indirectly giving credit to Jeff Garcia, yet another teammate he had thrown under a bus...this one with a rainbow bumper sticker. The silence was only broken when Baron Davis ran in and smashed the controversial Cowboys receiver in the face with a shaving cream pie. |
17 |
Panthers
 |
Jake Delhomme doesn't have many weaknesses...well, unless you want to count him thinking he can make any throw in the free world one. |
18 |
Bills
 |
It's really a shame Peerless went to Atlanta and ruined his career. He'll never be that first time around Bills receiver again. |
19 |
Titans
 |
*grabs that Fiya strawberry Country Time lemonade and enjoys this weeks round of excuses*
"Ahhhhhhhhhh."
|
20 |
Steelers
 |
After getting cut, earlier this week, Deuce Staley was seen in South Beach having lunch with Shaq. They were said to be laughing about getting paychecks for riding the coattails of young guys to a title. |
21 |
Rams
 |
Arson's Fiya Question of the Week: Am I really an asshole because I don't leave feedback on eBay? I just don't feel like it. Shit. |
22 |
Dolphins
 |
Damn, and I was really starting to believe they would run the table. |
23 |
Vikings
 |
Pep does it, and the world is ready to explode on some Spaceballs shit; Brad Johnson does it and people ignore it like it's the kid with autism holding up the slide at the McDonalds playground. |
24 |
49ers
 |
If Vernon Davis doesn't go down, how good would they have been? |
25 |
Browns
 |
What the hell is up with these kickers booting these big ass field goals at the end of games, this year? The shit looks like EA Sports made and turned on a "kick FG's longer" option. |
26 |
Texans
 |
"No this cocksucker didn't throw for -5 yards passing and still won the game!" - Rex Grossman |
27 |
Redskins
 |
The mandatory Randle El reverse is gonna get that boy killed, Saunders. Teams have that shit scouted like it's a Junior Woodchuck badge. |
28 |
Cardinals
 |
Holy Lord, an Edge sighting! |
29 |
Packers
 |
I mean, really. What else bad can I say about this washed up, pick throwing, bottom of the bus teammate throwing-drug abuser, other than he's not helping his team win? |
30 |
Buccaneers
 |
I think it's safe to say, Chris Simms will have a chance to compete for the starting job, many said he had lost, next year. |
31 |
Raiders
 |
After the loss to Houston in which the Oakland defense shut down the Texans offense like a Cathy Lee Gifford sponsored sweatshop, Warren Sapp was quoted as saying he felt like he just got food poisoning...of course it was a stretch, because that only happens on the road and Raiders played the game at home. |
32 |
Lions
 |
Jason Hanson still kicks for them? Goddamn, Andy Rooney's run on 60 Minutes hasn't been this long. |
