FiyaStarter.com - Linwood Jenkins

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Linwood Jenkins

--Standing 6-4, 220 pounds, Linwood was the star center for Mary McLeod Bethune High School in Bucktown, Alabama, a small community of approximately 250 African-Americans that is located right outside of Adulasia. According to the school’s official scorekeeper, Linwood’s uncle, Sylvester, Linwood averaged 76 points, 48 rebounds, 43 blocks, 34 steals and 2 assists a game during his senior season. “The boy just had a gift. People say he only dominated like he did because he was four inches taller than the next tallest kid, but that ain’t have nothing to do with it. He could stand still and dunk that ball from the free throw line. He shot 98% percent from the line because of that.” Sylvester also adds that Linwood wasn’t selected to play in the 1982, where he would have faced Cheese Eyes McDonald’s All-American game “because of racism.”

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FIYA NBA Rankings PLAYOFF PREVIEW EDITION: The Finals
Team Match Up	FIYA Analysis
Boston (1) vs Los Angeles (1)	Fiya Matchup: Boston's 2-sometimes 3, LA's 2-sometimes 3
	Team Sparks: Farmar, Sasha, House, Powe
	Series Fiya Starter(s): KG, Pierce, Kobe, Gasol, LO
	Series Fiya Moment: Kobe in the closeout game making a move to the rim with both teams stopping; the Lakers because they want a good view of the defining moment of their '08 playoff run, and the Celts because no one wants to be on that poster.
	Dat ‘Nalysis: A Lakers vs. Celtics Final: I'm sure David Stern is happier than a Jew inheriting...no, he's far happier than that...anyway, this is the series everyone has anticipated since about Christmas. It has everything; the hype, the history and more Star Power than my cheap ass cable/internet provider, now oddly renamed RCN (wtf?). First of all, if you’re a fan of FiyaStarter or you merely read our NBA Preview in last October’s issue of Complex Mag, you know we already successfully predicted the winner of this year’s Larry O’Brien ‘Ship trophy. While our Aryan counterparts, in that same issue, foolishly predicted Timmy 3000, Frenchie and them old ass men to win during an even year, we poignantly stated: “Any team except San Antonio. Cam’ron has a better chance of drowning in that small ass pool than the Spurs do of winning back-to-back titles. HAHAHA! Cam keep the chlorine cleanin’…KILLA!” Nine months later we’re all still waiting for that hot summer Cam promised us and Timmy is busy swimming in the Virgin Islands and shopping for ugly ass duty free Sean Jean button-downs for next season. As far as this series, for Boston to have a chance, their first unit is going to have to get off to great starts. Ray, who has been down and rarely up cannot afford to have another Cleveland type shooting series. Pawly has to come out aggressive and KG cannot take a play off. Much like aimless baby boomers that kept investing during the 90’s dotcom blast, they have little to nothing in their reserve. It’s the reason Popazit won one game sticking to the script with Manu off the bench and why John Lithgow won no games, by inserting Linus Kleiza in the starting lineup. The Lakers second unit is young, scrappy, and they can shoot and defend. After facing AI, Deron Williams and Parker, Farmar and Sasha will finally not have to worry about possible assault charges they’ve almost filed during the last couple series’. ET and his younger cousin that starts are hardly as scary as those guys—talent wise, I mean. If the games are close when those second units come in, the Celts better hope Eddie House and James “Wesley Pipes” Posey are on from long range. Back to the starters, KG must, I repeat, must take Pau into the post. If settles for those 15 footers that drop in the first and come up shorter and shorter as crunch time nears, then he’s just giving the Lakers a freebee on defense. Pawly and his old man game will be the most dependable weapon the Celts have, until the fourth when Phil instructs Bauer to tail him. On the Lakers side, Lamar must continue to find the mismatches and exploit them, while Pau has to attempt to post a bit more, himself. Since neither Duncan or Okur’s big asses are gonna be down there to turn him away, maybe he can have more success. Kobe is gonna act a damn fool and we know there aint much of nothing Pawly, Posey or the two or three surviving armed cops from The Departed can do about it. Lastly, Boston better win those first two at home. They are a suspect road team and the two-three-two Finals format and Lakers perfect post season home record have to be in the back of their heads. Ok, we’re almost done here. Reactions in each player’s head after the final buzzer: KG “I have no one to curse at and beat in the head but myself.” Pawly “I wonder if Trevor Ariza can drop me off in Inglewood.” Ray “I hope no one looks at me—not because I played like shit, but my jersey isn’t tucked right in my shorts. Oh, God I’ll just kill myself if they catch me on camera looking like this.” Doc “My hair hasn’t grown all year, yet I’m still not bald. It's shiny though…amazing!” Cassell finger blinks Posey “I wonder if Trevor can drop me off in Van Nuys after he drops off Pawly.” Big Baby “Which is closer Fat Burger or Carls Jr.?” Kobe “Thank you, Jesus, now all I ask you for is three more, so I can pass Cheese Eyes.” Pau “Spanish bitches. I want lots of Spanish bitches and I want them now…and no, I’m not shaving for them.” L.O. throws on a Rich Soil t-shirt with hooded blazer, grabs a joint from Vic the Brick, hits Sunset Phil horse whistles for Jeannie to go get the Hydrogen 745 they drive off passing Dr. Buss, Jerry West and two hot blond 18-year-olds Luke hears Grateful Dead ringtone on his phone, pushes silent button Rest of the Lakers squad in the midst of a dancing exhibition put on by Ronny Turiaf, Kwame surprises the remainder of the team with a cake peculiarly labeled Happy Birthday Frederick
	Pick: Kobe's Legacy in 5