FIYA NBA
Rankings #20 |
Rank |
Team |
FIYA Analysis |
1 |
Celtics
 |
Why Kendrick look scared when he threw that alley to KG? LMAO...nigga look like a kid doing something he knew he aint have no business doing. |
2 |
Pistons
 |
I can't wait to see Stuckey Dogg in the playoffs. It's been a while since a dude named Rodney showed his ass in the sports world. Every time he make a big play this summer, I'mma be like, "AND his name Rodney. GOOD!" |
3 |
Spurs
 |
Will you be surprised to see them come out of the West? |
4 |
Hornets
 |
M-V-P. I swear to God, I'mma start throwing niggas down stairs, if they keep tryna make arguments for other dudes. |
5 |
Lakers
 |
Kobe look like a cop in a bad action movie screaming for backup right now. |
6 |
Suns
 |
Shaq. Do y'all see him? I'm serious. Shaq-haters need to start being scared. He look mad. He done started saying, "Let's go, MOTHERFUCKERS!" every time he get that O-board and dunk it back in. That means he's gonna try hard until someone eliminates his big ass, and that is hard to do. |
7 |
Jazz
 |
I hope they can convince someone that AK is worth a lottery pick. |
8 |
Magic
 |
D. Howard's free throw problems are costing me money. |
9 |
Rockets
 |
Miss the playoffs for a CHANCE at a good PG, y'all. Damn. |
10 |
Mavs
 |
Dirk looked like a cold bitch. Aint nuffin wrong with him. Him and Vince should have a contest to see who overreacts to a boo-boo the best. |
11 |
Warriors
 |
Monta Ellis might look like an old mechanic, but he is the fastest lil fucker I've seen in a long time. |
12 |
Cavs
 |
Ben Wallace looks like a dude from another era. He should be wearing leisure suits made of only the worst flammable fabrics known to man. |
13 |
Nuggets
 |
Yella Boi is ballin. If they make it, he's the guy to give the credit to. |
14 |
Raptors
 |
Dat Conquistador done took TJ spot. |
15 |
76ers
 |
Billy King drafted a lotta talent, y'all. Pretend he's a dumb ass college freshman and give that man some credit! |
16 |
Hawks
 |
Why is Jimmy Walker always at the Hawks games holding up a sign that says "That's my boy!" when Marvin Williams makes a play? |
17 |
Blazers
 |
Roy done slowed down, huh? |
18 |
Pacers
 |
Dunny Jr. Most Improved...jump shot, facial hair, swagger, body control and pussy-to-approach ratio. |
19 |
Bulls
 |
Make lottery, draft Rose. Why are they tryna win? |
20 |
Wizards
 |
Gilbert needs to stop pouting and shut it down. He's just mad because he's not one of the top players in the league anymore. Newsflash: He never really was, anyway. |
21 |
Nets
 |
Jefferson blaming Kidd? That's like that gay dude blaming Terry McMillan. Well, not really, but it is another gay guy blaming the person who took care of them and made them rich. |
22 |
Bobcats
 |
Gerald, I need you to act right for this last month, dogg. Don't get concussed, please. |
23 |
Bucks
 |
|
24 |
Kings
 |
Kevin Martin will be an All-Star, next year. |
25 |
Clippers
 |
Prediction: Corey Maggette's agent will utter the following to more than 10 GMs this summer: "NOPE! You see them numbers. MMMMHUH! Give it." And Corey will be riding around in his SUV of Solitude inserting them highlight crystals and laughing. |
26 |
Knicks
 |
Isiah is really startin to look like Bowser...can't nobody kill this nigga. |
27 |
Sonics
 |
I just aint sure he's done enough to lock down ROY. |
28 |
Grizzlies
 |
I don't buy the idea that they can't be big in Memphis. They just need to get a good team on the floor. |
29 |
T-Wolves
 |
Randy Foye was supposed to be a beast. I guess when you can't take 20 shots a game, some flaws are bound to show. |
30 |
Heat
 |
Don't count D-Wade out. They are gonna get a legit #2 man in the draft and Riles will make the needed moves. |
FiyaStarter's
Top 10 Rookie Watch |
Kevin Durant
(19.8 PPG 4.2 RPG): His numbers have gone up since the break.
A surprise to most.
Al Horford
(9.8 PPG 9.6 RPG): Al has only had a combined four boards in the last two games.
Get them ATL strippers off your mind, boy.
Luis Scola
(9.7 PPG 6.1 RPG): This muhfucka is 27. He shouldn’t even be considered a rookie,
but since I have to include his ass, here’s his spot.
Al Thornton
(12.3 PPG 4.3 RPG): With the way Thornton is playing, I’m not so sure
I wouldn’t trade Brand either…nah, still wouldn’t.
Jamario Moon
(8.5 PPG 6.3 RPG): Come playoff time he’s gonna be counted on to slow
down swingmen. What a thankless ass job…well, unless your last name is Bowen.
Jeff Green
(9.7 PPG 4.6 RPG): G-Town sure coulda used him, last week.
Juan Carolos Navarro
(10.9 PPG 2.2 APG): Juan struggled against the Clipps, but it happens to
all good shooters. Just look at Stephen Curry down the
stretch of this
Kansas game...oh, never mind, he just hit one.
Thaddeus Young
(7.9 PPG 4.3 RPG): I really hope he doesn’t rap. That stage name "Young Thaddeus"
might seem clever, but trust, it’s a PR disaster waiting to happen.
Sounds like a poser/mathematician.
Joakim Noah
(6.0 PPG 5.5 RPG): As part of their punishment for playing like shit, this year,
Florida Coach-Peninsula Pimp Billy forwarded the entire team an incoherent
Joakim Noah voicemail. Five minutes of “Yo’s, B’s and cocksuckers”
has contributed to the Gators N.I.T. run.
Nick Young
(7.2 PPG 1.7 RPG): "Young Nick." Now, that’s a marketable rap name for the dumb kids.
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