FIYA NBA
Rankings #14 |
Rank |
Team |
FIYA Analysis |
1 |
Celtics
 |
Rondo is becoming every bit as good as I thought he'd be and it's pissing me off. |
2 |
Pistons
 |
Sheed isn't getting enough props for how well he's been playing this season. And he's avoiding controversy. |
3 |
Suns
 |
So, I played with the new Suns on 2K8 and I never even realized how unfair it'll be having Shaq's big ass set picks up top for Nash. |
4 |
Hornets
 |
Tyson Chandler says he was recently called by friend and former teammate Eddy Curry, who was looking for some advice. Asked what he told Curry, Chandler stated, "Four words: 'Try, you big bitch.'" |
5 |
Mavs
 |
Jerry "The Brow" Stackhouse put his college education to good use by verbally poking Rod Thorn in the ass and effectively guaranteeing that he will never be a Maverick again, provided the Jason Kidd deal is done with the original players involved. |
6 |
Lakers
 |
Somehow the news of Kobe's injured pinky reached my boy Dave and got mangled into some bullshit story about Kobe fucked Pinky and got hurt. Seriously. |
7 |
Spurs
 |
Ginobili plays like a fucking cop. I hate him. |
8 |
Jazz
 |
At this point, trading AK-47 would be huge step back. He's not the problem; Ronnie Brewer needs to play better. |
9 |
Blazers
 |
Lately, I've found myself laughing really hard at that Oden ESPN commercial. It's that dumb ass stare and that "Boom." Big G got that comedy. |
10 |
Warriors
 |
|
11 |
Cavs
 |
Why do I get the strangest feeling that Andre Miller is headed back here? |
12 |
Rockets
 |
Hottest team outside of Boston. But, there is no doubt they are tanking in round one. |
13 |
Nuggets
 |
While fellow thugsters AI and Melo were fulfilling press obligations in New Orleans, Kenyon was scouring the city for the good weed and nastiest hood rats. |
14 |
Magic
 |
Turkey Do is really justifying Lewis' salary, isn't he? |
15 |
Raptors
 |
Observe. Their level of play is directly related to Mitchell's hair moisture. |
16 |
Hawks
 |
Upon hearing the news of his trade, Shelden Williams looked skyward, pounded his chest and unleashed a powerful, indecipherable guttural roar, which was later confirmed to be laughter by his good friend Harrison Ford. |
17 |
Wizards
 |
If there was a such thing as the "World's Strongest Face" competition, I'm pretty sure Jamison and Butler would both place in the top five. |
18 |
Nets
 |
If they trade Kidd and Vince in the next few days, Richard Jefferson is gonna be dancing like Ving Rhames was in that shower in I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry. RJ is a stat-hogger. |
19 |
76ers
 |
If they make the postseason, all the glory goes to Them 'Specs. |
20 |
Pacers
 |
Vince for J.O.? Please let Bad Dad make this deal. I will drown in my own tears of joy. |
21 |
Bulls
 |
Despite it all, these bitches are gonna make the playoffs. Disgusting. Watch them be ass backwards and make the conference finals. |
22 |
Bucks
 |
Mo Williams needs to stay healthy for a good month, if this team is gonna make a push. |
23 |
Bobcats
 |
The death of Emeka v. Dwight was cemented by that big ass super dunk. This one is way worse than Zo v. Shaq. |
24 |
Kings
 |
I think they're gonna take the cap relief, because trading Ron Ron is gonna fuck them up. Just let him go about his business this summer. |
25 |
Clippers
 |
I just realized Elgin is gonna be on that damn stage again at the lottery, lookin like the oldest member of the Senate in Star Wars. |
26 |
Knicks
 |
This shit is like watching a 20 car pile-up, with one person getting blamed for being behind the wall of every car involved. |
27 |
Grizzlies
 |
Darko is still only 22 and something tells me he's gonna get a whole lot better really soon. If you watch him, you can see him figuring it out. |
28 |
Sonics
 |
Durant better watch out, because Al Horford is not bullshittin'. |
29 |
T-Wolves
 |
GODDAMN! Al Jefferson is good. I aint been this wrong about a player since I said Robert Traylor was the best PF in the '98 draft. |
30 |
Heat
 |
Shawn Marion isn't concerned with wins and losses right now, folks. He's just trying to make us remember he was putting up monster numbers before Nash "helped" him. |
