FiyaStarter.com - Linwood Jenkins

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“I was gonna drive around
the corner and get a blow job.”
-Charles Barkley
Drunk ass political hopeful.

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Linwood Jenkins

--Standing 6-4, 220 pounds, Linwood was the star center for Mary McLeod Bethune High School in Bucktown, Alabama, a small community of approximately 250 African-Americans that is located right outside of Adulasia. According to the school’s official scorekeeper, Linwood’s uncle, Sylvester, Linwood averaged 76 points, 48 rebounds, 43 blocks, 34 steals and 2 assists a game during his senior season. “The boy just had a gift. People say he only dominated like he did because he was four inches taller than the next tallest kid, but that ain’t have nothing to do with it. He could stand still and dunk that ball from the free throw line. He shot 98% percent from the line because of that.” Sylvester also adds that Linwood wasn’t selected to play in the 1982, where he would have faced Cheese Eyes McDonald’s All-American game “because of racism.”

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(*updated through the previous Saturday, morons)

FIYA NBA Rankings PLAYOFF PREVIEW EDITION: Round 3
Team Match Up	FIYA Analysis
Spurs (3) vs Jazz (4)	Fiya Matchup: Frenchie vs. Chubby Mulatto, players none of which are GNash.
	Team Sparks: Manose, Fried Fish
	Series Fiya Starter(s): Duncan, Booz
	Series Fiya Moment: The series sealing Horry 3, what else?
	Tim Duncan is the best player on the court, but let's be serious, this series is about the point guards and how they make everyone around them better---you know, the shit Steve GNash failed to do last round, but everyone is trying to ignore? We're not going to sit here put the weight of this series on the Ginobili's or Matt Harpring's, like Suns apologists are trying to do with Shawn Marion. Oh no, plus it ain't like he took two dumb ass three's down the stretch of a big game five anyway. No sir, the man running the show should be held accountable for getting his big man the ball. Only if that big man isn't putting up, say, 38 and dozen or so rebounds, should that point guard be let off the hook. Wait, only if he plays defense, that is. You can't forget defense. It's what triggers offense for teams that don't have shooters in every corner to go along with two All-Stars, a Sixth-Man award winner and former Coach of the Year that has installed a fun-ball offense for his squad. So, yeah, Parker and Williams have to get Duncan and Booz the ball and the one that does that the best will win this series. I personally think Parker has the best chance of doing this and when the double teams come he is going to bake anything inside that three-point line like Sheppard's Pie.
	Pick: Spurs in six
Pistons (1) vs Cavs (2)	Fiya Matchup: Tay's length vs. Bron's brute
	Team Sparks: Pav, Sheed
	Series Fiya Starter(s): Billups, Bron
	Series Fiya Moment: Sheed is getting kicked out of one of those game's in Cleveland.
	I fully expect this thing to be over in five, but let me just say this: the way Detroit looked in games four and five of the Bulls series looked errily like the Lakers team they demolished in the Finals a few years ago: OLD. There were a hand full of plays I can recall off the top of my head that included Bulls players willing to run and dive for loose balls while their Piston counterparts held their backs and diversified their portfolio's. Detroit will win this because Cleveland doesn't have the shooters nor half court discipline to compete with Chauncey's teeth, but it will probably take longer than it should because Detroit knows they will eventually outsmart the Cavs should they have to. Hughes is cold and getting booed. Gooden is due to come back to Earth any minute now. And Gibson aside, this team lacks the spark that Damon Jones' gums would have provided in a past life. Can they really expect a rookie to provide that in this big a series? No. Detroit's only problem is that Flip and his team need all the rest they can get because San Antonio is coming for them rings, next round.
	Pick: Detroit in five