FIYA NBA Rankings #22 |
Rank |
Team |
FIYA Analysis |
1 |
Mavs
 |
Congrats to Avery Johnson for winning Coach of the year (We broke this story.NOPE!) |
2 |
Spurs
 |
Timmy done had Amare's number for years and Amare still can't get a call (not that I'm blaming the refs or anything). |
3 |
Suns
 |
Steve Nash in a half court game is like Marshall Falk grinding out runs. It can still be effective, but it doesn't strike fear in defenders. |
4 |
Pistons
 |
Call me sentimental, but I'd like to see Webber win a title and call a timeout as the clock winds down, so he can take a big bow in front of his city and his folks. That shit would be great. |
5 |
Jazz
 |
I know Okur ain't tryna go cold from three when I got that fantasy league title within my grasp. AND he's missing FTs. This some bullshit! |
6 |
Bulls
 |
Big Ben gets paid more than anyone in history to miss point-blank lay-ups. |
7 |
Cavs
 |
Drew Gooden is the Taraji Henson of basketball. Sometimes he looks great and sometimes he looks like a greasy, nappy-headed hot ass mess. |
8 |
Raptors
|
Darvin Ham needs to confront Joey Graham about stealing his life. |
9 |
Rockets
 |
Mac's back is gonna surpass Friday the 13th's record of most horror sequels. |
10 |
Heat
 |
Wade returns for the stretch run. I hope he doesn't try to elbow too much of the load, because a shoulder comment is too obvious. |
11 |
Nuggets
 |
Iverson shocked many recently with a baseline dunk on the Kings. I don't see the big deal. It's not like he had any rings weighing him down or anything. |
12 |
Lakers
 |
Everyone needs to back off and give Smush a break. It's not like we didn't know he was sorry. Dude is a backup and he's been forced to start. Blame Kupchak. |
13 |
Magic
 |
Orlando is pulling the ol' less minutes/let's stats/less money routine on Darko. The last time a team tried to pull that shit, Booz left Cleveland, holding a bag of money. |
14 |
Clippers
 |
God, please let Cassell sign with TNT next year, so he can be in the studio with Chuck. He may be ugly, but he can jone. |
15 |
Nets
 |
As I'm sure you've heard by now, Kidd and Vince became the first pair of ringless teammates to have triple-doubles in the same game, while both are going through divorce. Amazing. That record won't be broken. |
16 |
Pacers
 |
It's great watching them be bad enough to not make the playoffs and just good enough to keep them from having their pick. After this looong, pathetic season their fans will have nothing to look forward to on draft night. |
17 |
Warriors
 |
When you consider the fact that Foyle makes over eight mil a year and doesn't spend his money on bullshit like rims and ice, it's not crazy to suggest he has more money than most of the league's superstars. |
18 |
Wizards
 |
There's no truth to the rumor that Kobe will yell "My KNEE!" each time Arenas shoots a good-looking shot, next year. |
19 |
Hornets
 |
Why did this team not tank the season? Brewer, Green, Noah.Chris Paul makes these players three times better than they already are. Damn, sometimes you gotta take a few steps back to gain enough momentum to make a big leap. |
20 |
Knicks
 |
Am I the only once who thinks Eddy looks like a dancing bear when he makes his moves in the post? He's a big nimble ass dude. |
21 |
T-Wolves
 |
I see the annual KG "I Don't Wanna Go" campaign is in full swing. This nigga needs to sing some R&B slow jams, as much as he don't wanna go. |
22 |
Kings
 |
I still don't understand how Bibby decided he wanted to have hair after eight years. Derek Anderson lookin at this nigga like, "You little fuck." |
23 |
Bucks
 |
Redd is the latest guy to spray paint himself a new hairline and look like a damn fool. That shit looks like he got his hair cut with lasers. |
24 |
76ers
 |
If Billy King can't rebuild with Iggy and three first rounders, Larry Brown deserves his job. |
25 |
Blazers
 |
Miami. Memorial Day. Zach. Booked. |
26 |
Hawks
 |
|
27 |
Sonics
 |
It didn't seem too long ago that Luke Ridnour was an up and coming young PG. Remember all that Team USA talk? What the hell happened? |
28 |
Bobcats
 |
Gerald Wallace got Mike and Bob looking at their checkbooks harder than their ex-wives ever did. They don't know what to do with this nigga. |
29 |
Celtics
 |
How many chances does Gerald Green need to prove he's not a star? I know he has nine fingers, but does he need nine lives, too? |
30 |
Grizzlies
 |
The good news is this team gets either Durant or Oden. The better news is the season is almost over. |
