I have sat here trying to figure out how I can hate on Charlize without hating on Will's movie (because it is HIS, ya know), but there's really no way to do it. I'm just gonna have to split them up. Will's gets 5 fiya ball and Charlize gets none.
I don't need to talk about Will in this review. He's the biggest star in Hollywood...that actually makes investors some fucking money, unlike CLOONEY! He gets acclaim and them numbers, so there's really nothing left to say, especially when I can focus on hating Charlize, who don't be doing them numbers, but will now be able to point to this one on her rez and be like "NOPE! You see it. I got a blockbuster." Meanwhile, you don't get to see Halle get to point to all three of them X-Mens and say the same. I think that deserves a "Hmmmmmm," as well as a "How curiously RACIST!"
Charlize is the female version of Clooney. She aligns herself with people who are far more talented and charismatic and then she steps into the spotlight on the strength of her looks. She needed this hit BADLY. Before Superhero Will saved this ho, she wasn't doing no numbers. She stepped out on her own, in a blatant attempt to get some numbers, with some damn Aeon Flux and BOMBED, so she retreated to taking roles Jodie Foster turned down in North Country and In the Valley of Elah. They were both good films, but that doesn't negate the point. She has never broken 40 million without a strong male lead, whereas Halle has done so with Gothika and Catwoman. Why don't Halle get the credit that Charlize be getting? I know y'all see this shit!! And Halle looks younger than her, too.
Halle Berry has broken 100 million three more times more than Charlize (Flintstones, three X-Men, Die Another Day and Robots vs. The Italian Job and Hancock) yet I guarantee you that Charlize will be pulling bigger checks for simply riding Will's 'Cock this summer (*proud of self*). Does that seem fair?
I would have no problem with Charlize if people would just leave Halle alone. All I'm saying is people gotta be fair. You can't say Halle is just another pretty face who overacted her way to an Oscar and not say the same for Charlize. Be consistent, y'all.
Anyway, I guess it's good that we got the first good black superhero since Meteor Man. Now, is it better than Meteor Man? I'm gonna have to give that a strong "FUCK NO!." First of all, ‘That Man had a stronger cast. Don Cheadle was the villain. NOPE!!! Don Cheadle was the villain and it had three of the greatest old black men ever with Bill Cosby, James Earl Jones and Robert Guilluame. If all that wasn't enough, then they came with Sinbad, Big Daddy Kane, Luther Vandross, Marla Gibbs and Nancy Wilson.
Nigga, you best stop playing. That movie was and is the movie by which all black superhero movies shall be judged, and Hancock just didn't get to that level.
