FiyaStarter.com - Kwame Nyame

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“My team ALWAYS plays better
at home. We don't travel well.”
-The Good Doctor
...with a sex reference

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Kwame Nyame (20-something)

-*pronounced Kwa, Niya--May

-He black

-Hates white people, but loves rich white people, that is if they give him money, matter of fact he likes anybody that gives him money (Nope, don't get cute).

-Is sick and tired of Oprah, Terry McMillan, DL Brothas, sistas on the internet complaining about DL Brothas. Matter of fact he is just sick and tired of sistas complaining about the latest shit that black men have done wrong.

FiyaStarter RATING =

Fiyaball

Movie Review

Daddy's Little Girls
A Good Film, But At What Co$t?
by: Kwame Nyame, for Entertainment

Daddy's Little Girls? Hahahaha, Tyler you done fucked up now, trying to switch it up, showing black men in a positive light.

Daddy’s Little Girls has inspired me so that I’ve decided to get involved with the youth and instantly give back with some financial advice. So, for today’s lesson we’re going to focus on how all you kids out there can become a millionaire.

First off, produce a book, then a film or song about how black men are worthless child molesters. Make sure there’s plenty of stuff in there about how black women’s needs must be catered to at all cost. It will also help, if at the end of the book/film/song, some hi-yella, blue collar brother comes in to save the day.

By the way, if you’re asking how I’m so sure this will be successful, then…well, shit, just watch anything Tyler Perry has ever created (before this), or any other black film that sisters go out to see in droves, for that matter, and you will too see the damn light.

I’m convinced that black women hate black men...from watching Perry’s films. I mean just look at this here D.L. Girls (yeah, I caught that D.L., Tyler). It’s his only offering with a black man worth two shits. And SURPRISE, SURPRISE it is his least successful film. Diary Of A Grown Man Dressed As Grandmother, a.k.a. the apex of “black men ain’t shit” films, where a black man can’t think of anything better to do than leave his dark skinned wife for a white woman, had sisters coming out of the woods to support it. We can lie, but if we’re being honest, we all agree that Diary was a bullshit movie only redeemed by the fact Kimberley Elise, one of the greatest black actresses of our time, came in and saved it (no thanks to the awful makeup on that set…I mean goddamn, hire one of them brawds at the Macys counter).

Next was Cross-dressing Grown Man’s Family Reunion, telling jokes and beating children while the rest of the movie featured Blair Underwood beat the shit out of some weak minded redbone chick. I mean do you even realize how much of a “black men ain’t shit” fest, Cross-dresser’s Family Reunion was? Just about every problem was traced back to black men; abuse, rape, molesting—bad credit.

Goddamn!
“Black men ain’t shit” movies are goldmines!

Using the Terry MacMillions/Oprah formula to build an empire, Tyler was nearly $500 million strong, so he figured he had enough money and clout to make a movie featuring positive black men and trifling sisters---AND GUESS WHAT?

THEM NEGATIVE HEAT-SEEKING SISTAS WEREN’T HAVING IT.

If it’s one thing I know about black women, it’s that when they want some negativity and they don’t get it, they get mad and find them some. For Tyler, they took it out on that box-office. Damn shame too, because dude, finally made a movie worth seeing.

If I didn’t know any better I would’ve thought Tyler was a pretty good filmmaker. The characters were well developed, no soap opera-like overacting, Cicely Tyson didn’t show up reprising her role as Miss Jane Pittman, Maya Angelou wasn’t reading poems about black womanhood…and get this Tyler went the entire movie without having somebody go to church and get saved.

Yeah I said it. Tyler made a movie and nobody got SAVED!

Go see this, kids. Also stay away from drugs, use condoms, stay in school, and remember to berate and degrade black men and you will succeed in life, just like Tyler.

PS. Tyler, I know you can come back from this and get the sisters to love you again. Need an idea? Well, why not something about a nigga that is secretly gay and uses black women’s frailties and insecurities for financial gain.