 |
||||||||
l
|
||||||||
- Wanna submit something?
|
FiyaStarter RATING =  Fiyaballs
As a matter of fact, I remember back to the very day I saw it… I was in front of some movie theater in Brooklyn with my ex-girl. Earlier in the day we went to a cookout her family had and two of her cousins were telling us we should go see that ‘Denity instead of the ScienTomogy Report. I was just lookin at them niggas trying my best not to throw them out of that brownstone, Jazzy Jeff style. Later on that night, standing in front of the theater, shorty was telling me that her cousins are usually spot on about movies, to which I replied, “Woman, I am Reggie fuckin Eggert, the movie maverick of the Eastern seaboard; I don’t give a fuck what your faggot ass cousins said. We are going to see Tom use that technology and that’s final!” Then I gave her a look that would’ve spooked Joe Jackson in his Indiana home. I wasn’t thinking about no damn Ben Affleck sidekick losing his memory. It was all about Tom in the future, doing all that futuristic shit…the shit I live for. During one of the first scenes of that Report, Cruise delivered and hit that big ass touch screen and all the shit that Microsoft and Apple just got on, popped up and dazzled me to no avail on that giant screen. I leaned over to shorty and sternly muttered, “Matt Damon ain’t fuckin with them touch screens.” I don’t regret my decision in choosing them touch screens over Damon’s ‘Dentity, but I do regret not sneaking into the theater next door and catching an impromptu double-feature. Five years later, a Best Buy two-for-one Bourne super-pack, and free ticket to the Bourne Ultimatum later and I am going to go out on a limb and say that if Minority Report had been a trilogy, it probably wouldn’t be as good as the Bourne series. These movies have done the near impossible and gotten progressively better each time out. That’s a tall friggin order, just ask The Wachowski Brothers. What’s more amazing is that Ultimatum bested the first two films by doing the same thing they did, only better! The following is a list of reasons why that ‘Matum is Hot Fucking Fiya:
*I suppose apologies to the faggots in Brooklyn are due.
|
FIYA NBA Ranks: #9 |
||||||
I have a confession to make: I’m late as a muhfuckka to the Jason Bourne party. I'm with it now, but up until recently, I hadn’t seen any of the Bourne movies in their entirety. Thinking back, my only excuse is that right around the time The Bourne Identity dropped in 2002, Scientology spokes male Tom Cruise and his film Minority Report was plastered every-fuckin-where. And of course I was brainwashed (…too easy) to believe that that’s all the action cinema I needed. 