Duller Than Preschooler’s Pencil.

Having recently viewed and enjoyed the teen Twilight saga for the first time (I know, but am I really that late, or am I just not fucking 13?), the advanced viewing tickets I received for The Wolfman couldn’t have come at a more opportune time for my reluctant ass. I don’t particularly [...]

Cuswag Upstages Mother Nature.

2012 is the latest on my short list of flicks with one important variable; scared ass people running from unimaginably exaggerated Mother Nature created special effects. In The Chronicles of Riddick, Vinny’s scared ass ran from that hot ass sun like it was a YouTube of him break dancing. In The Day [...]

Stallone, Jet Li, Jason Statham, Bruce Willis, Arnold, Mickey Rourke, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Randy Couture, Dolph Lundgren, Terry Crews (gotta name at least one black guy) and Eric Motherfuckin’ Roberts among others. I’ve got a feeling The Expendables will only be allowed on IMAX screens to fit  this action-Oceans on steroids cast.

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“You need a change of pace.” He had the nerve to write that line in.
per: Trailer Addict
Yes, more pressed than Tyler to make the same movie. The guy’s name is Larry Cohen and he’s the writer of past “Thriller’s” such as Phone Booth and Cellular. This time Larry’s masterpiece Messages Deleted  is about an aspiring [...]

Tip gonna still be in jail too, so Chris is getting even more run.
Make way for the king. Chris Brown is officially on his way back to kick everyone who left him for dead, square in the ass.
NOPE! 
Save that Rihanna punch line. This has gone on long enough and with those details about that unfaithful (ok, [...]

The Flight 93 of ‘09.
Hov on that new shit,
Niggas like, “How come?”
Niggas want my old shit,
Buy my old albums.
 While I won’t disagree with the last line, everything that precedes it is debatable, to say the least.
At this point it’s safe to say Jay-Z albums are among the select few that grab the attention of the [...]

It sucked. Put that in your pipe and smoke it, bitches.
Getting What He Was Going For and Knowing It Still Sucks
Ya know, he’s going to get nominated for this. I figure if I say it out loud I might jinx it and it won’t happen. But, it won’t help. This guy is in a rare space right [...]

The greatest cameo in movie comedy history? We think so. 
If you are a movie fan and like good comedy, there’s no excuse for not knowing knowing about Orvis Goodnight, the angry black record producer and David Whiteman’s neighbor in Down and Out in Beverly Hills.  Richard is not only the architect of Rock N’ Roll, he’s also the architect of greasy [...]

This better be in the sequel

I’m going to save you the obligatory comparison to a certain alien robot franchise and instead spend valuable time telling you about the next franchise that is sure to bring Hasbro a shitload of merchandising money and renewed interest into a real American hero cartoon over the next few years. 

If you’ve got Roundup $145 even if you have to stick up a meter maid to get it. The greatest box set since Season Two of Chappelle Show has  just docked like Shipwreck’s now defunct Naval vessel.
The Complete G.I. Joe Collectors Set includes all 95 O.G. episodes
*G.I. Jizzes*
on 17 DVDs in a footlocker along with a bunch of other goodies including a G.I. [...]